Series Z · Pre-revenue · Post-shame

The world's leading platform for professional accountability deflection.

Whatever broke, it wasn't you. Our enterprise-grade blame engine generates contextual, plausible-adjacent excuses tailored to your specific incident — at scale.

SOC 2 compliant in spirit Trusted by 0 Fortune 500 companies Zero-shame architecture
"Saved my career." — Engineer who deleted prod "It blamed Mercury. The board accepted it." — VP Engineering "My PIP was reversed." — Anonymous staff engineer "Better than therapy." — Sole DevOps engineer "The intern took the fall." — Senior architect "Worth every cent we paid (zero)." — CTO "Saved my career." — Engineer who deleted prod "It blamed Mercury. The board accepted it." — VP Engineering "My PIP was reversed." — Anonymous staff engineer "Better than therapy." — Sole DevOps engineer "The intern took the fall." — Senior architect "Worth every cent we paid (zero)." — CTO

Generate your blame.

Paste any technical artifact below. Our model will identify who to blame.

Engine online p99 latency: 800ms
incident.txt
// QUICK START — TRY ONE
stack trace
friday commit
SQL incident
midnight bug
OOM
force push
0 / 4000 characters
BLAME REPORT · OFFICIAL
Filed by: Blame Engine v2.1 · Confidence: Suspiciously high
Open report Share to X
Blames generated
99.97%
Plausibility rating
0
Refunds issued
100%
Not your fault
Enterprise-ready

Audited by no one. Trusted by everyone.

SOC 2 · in spirit
ISO 27001 · spiritually
HIPAA · we wish
GDPR · don't ask
FedRAMP · vibes only